INT. DORIAN CLUB – NIGHT.
The lighting is blood red.
The walls smell like old money and new cocaine.
Patrick Bateman — dressed like 1989 never ended — sits across from Donald J. Trump, who is sipping Diet Coke from a gold-rimmed tumbler and glancing at his reflection in every available surface.
This isn’t an interview.
This is a slow-motion philosophical car crash.
PATRICK BATEMAN:
Mr. Trump, you’re being censored for using the F-word during your rally in Ohio. But meanwhile, you’re also publicly supporting airstrikes in Iran. Help me understand.
Why is fuck obscene, but firebombing a sovereign nation is policy?
DONALD TRUMP (grinning):
Look, Patrick… I say what people are thinking. I drop the F-bomb, they lose their minds. But you drop actual bombs and suddenly it’s “presidential.”
You know, I always said I could shoot someone on Fifth Avenue and not lose voters. Well now? I could carpet bomb Tehran and still trend #1.
BATEMAN (leaning forward, voice lowering):
“We train young men to drop fire on people… but their commanders won’t allow them to write the word ‘fuck’ on their airplanes because it’s obscene.”
TRUMP:
What’s that, Shakespeare?
BATEMAN:
Colonel Kurtz. Apocalypse Now. Coppola’s masterpiece.
He saw the lie. The hypocrisy.
We worship destruction but panic at the sound of a four-letter word.
TRUMP:
He sounds like a real smart guy. Maybe I should’ve hired him instead of Bolton.
Look, Patrick, let me ask you something: You ever drop an F-bomb on Wall Street?
BATEMAN (smirking):
Every time I shorted a pension fund.
🔥 CUTAWAY: THE REAL BOMBS
As the two speak, stock footage rolls behind them:
- Drones dropping payloads over desert cities.
- Children screaming under rubble.
- Meanwhile, media headlines flash:
- “TRUMP DROPS F-BOMB AT OHIO RALLY – NATION OUTRAGED”
- “UN CONDEMNS STRIKES IN IRAN – WHITE HOUSE SILENT”
TRUMP (winking):
It’s all branding, Patrick. You drop a bomb on a wedding? That’s defense.
Say “fuck” on a mic? That’s outrage.
America’s more offended by syllables than shrapnel.
BATEMAN (cold):
Because we don’t hear the bombs.
Only the broadcast.